I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
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