he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
