One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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