i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Randomize
