He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize