I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whose ass print is on the piano?
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize