She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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