Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
