it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
