Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
