drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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