My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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