There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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