the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're making bets on your personal life
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
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