My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
