Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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