JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
