im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
