Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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