you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES