I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
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We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
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If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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