party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
17 People Reveal The Reasons Behind Their Foot Fetish
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.