Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
