I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
do herpes really smell.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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