Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
