drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Let's get the cat blown out
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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