Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize