How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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