I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
