what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize