he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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