your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize