you would pick up someone in the library
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
