Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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