Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
