Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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