benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize