I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be still, my beating vagina.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
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