I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize
