would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
