i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Randomize
