I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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