i just had sex bonerless
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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