he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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