omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize