508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
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I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
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I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.