I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
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