i think my mom watched the whole time
I want you more than these girls want KFC
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I think your dad took our porno
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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