didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
