I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
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That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
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Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Randomize